Views From the Rough.

Hi again,

As I'm sitting here browsing through the absolutely massive artwork folders on my computer, I realized that I had a few rough, progress shots of some of my more recent pieces (If you're saying "Recent, being like 10 months ago."... yes I realize that. No beef.)

At any rate, I figured why not share some of the unpublished, unfinished stuff here, where whomever is interested can look at the subtle digital strokes & the coloration, and do a little snobbish chin-stroking, a la gallery folks, then comment on how it channels early Picasso, or your neighbor's mentally-challenged 4 year-old. Whatever works for you, bud.

Enjoy the chicken scratch. Peace.

- Fred

1. "Furia" first steps. Originally her mouth was different.

 2. "Furia" continued. Drawing her hair. Smoothed out the eye a bit as well.

3. "Furia" continued. Coloring it in.

4. "Serena" first steps. Going freestyle on the hair.

5. "Serena" continued. Laying down basic colors for her face (during Flying Lotus listening sessions).

6. "Serena" continued. Putting a little blood into her lips and ears, evened out the facial colors a bit. 

7. "Escape" first steps. The very first rough sketch of the central figures. 

Heretik Studios has changed (FINALLY!)

Dear Web Citizens,

If you're reading this, first, thanks. I've been a ghost the past few months. The fact that you even bothered to come back and see what's happening means a lot. You're awesome.

Now to business.

After planning to overhaul the structure and functionality of Heretik Studios since late 2008, I have finally, FINALLY actually gone ahead and completed the revisions. You might have noticed that this blog looks completely differently than it did before. If you did not notice this, there are some wonderful advances in modern optometry that might be worth looking into. Just sayin'.

Heretik Studios has been completely facelifted, rehashed, cut up, and put back together again. The key word for this iteration (dubbed version 3) was simplicity. No more wacky, cumbersome pages with links pointing in every other direction. No more unnecessary files (there were MANY of these... trust me, I checked). No more useless pages (can we say "rants" anyone?).  Right now it's stripped down to the bare essentials of my creative world -- artwork, Gun, & poems. Add to that a short blurb about me, the online store, and of course The Heretik Times, and we've got a website.

I hope you enjoy the new, cleaner layout and find it easier to navigate. It's certainly easier on the eyes than the old, poop brown-colored version 1, or the hurried, inconsistent version 2. I'm still adding a couple of little things, but the core content is live and accessible to all once again.

With this update, comes what I hope will be my official return to the arts. It has been way too long. I've gone through an insane number of significant changes since the start of 2011, just as I predicted. I won't even begin to list all of the personal, academic, and professional events that have transpired, as that would take up an entire volume. Suffice it to say, a lot has changed, and it has kept me busier than ever before. Unfortunately, I set art aside in pursuit of my career and scholarly goals, and in the process began to forget that art is just as important a part of my life as the other things I love.

In light of that, I'm now raising a glass to toast not giving up on what I love, and raising a pencil to a page to let my imagination run wild again. I look forward to seeing what comes of it.

Saludos amigos.

Picking at Scabs.

Hey...


As some of you know, I embarked on a little venture to produce a truly raw, uncompromisingly soulful two-part piece to end the year 2010. This piece, while still in progress, has become something of an Achilles' heel. I have no logistical issue finishing the piece at all. I just can't seem to move past it in the ways I'd hoped.


In truth, as I worked at developing it, I took a moment to step back and take stock of the piece... and it scared the living shit out of me. It became apparent very quickly that this was more than a "deep & soulful" piece - it was completely, unflinchingly autobiographical, and I did not for one moment like what was looking back at me. In particular, the prose portion was what struck a strong chord. Here were my most central vulnerabilities laid out before me - the things that I've perhaps shared with only one or two very specific individuals, at most. What began as a work of fiction suddenly morphed into something far more reflective of a diarized form of my innermost thoughts. The words actually moved me to tears.


That reaction is the reason I can't move past the piece as I'd like to. I doubt anyone will connect with it the way I do... to genuinely appreciate the symbolism, not as symbols as at all, but as records of my experiences and hopes. Without living in my head, there is no way to see this piece in that way, and I'm unsatisfied with such a disconnect between the work and the audience. I'm still debating whether or not to go ahead and release the piece as originally intended. Part of me almost feels like I need to in order to progress, while the other part of me knows that the fallout could be pretty intense. We'll see. 


Either way, it's clear that this exercise in catharsis is a wound-tearing process; one that promises growth but simultaneously hints at awful possibilities. 


I guess I should also say "happy new year," since I sort of forgot amidst all the other stuff that's been going on (including a new research position, the unfortunate passing of my old pet cat, the start of another semester of graduate school, and toiling constantly at my next big project... more on that in the future.)


I wish I could remember what it feels like to slow down. Then again, rest is overrated. Back to business. 


- Fred

The Road to Catharsis.

Greetings,

This one is just a quick update on progress, outlooks, and ongoings in my recent days.  

Shortly after the last art show, I began marketing myself a bit more (what a concept!), and engaging in tons of "New York handshakes" (i.e., you take my card, I take yours) with lots of creative folks. Getting my name out there. Networking. That sort of thing. It's been good so far.  

I also realized that the semester is coming to a close, as is 2010, and I began reflecting on things (as endings tend to impel us to). I realized slowly that 2010 has been by far one of the more interesting years I've had so far. Lots of things have happened over these past 12 months, including meeting new and awesome people, forging some amazing new friendships, seeing some new locations, seeing some old faces, pushing myself through new and crazy challenges, exploring the depths of my potential, and above all letting my heart run wild at all times.  As I thought on these things, I began to conceive of a new piece. A truly stunning piece. Something that would shatter hearts and rend souls. Of course, I'm capable of no such thing. Ha. However, I'm capable certainly of giving it my best, earnest attempt, and I intend to do just that. 

What I'm essentially planning as my final piece of 2010 will be my absolute most personal piece to date. I find constantly that my mind is a living tempest of thought and emotion, and I need some outlet for it all, short of simply talking about it in plain English. Otherwise I risk being overwhelmed by it all (which happens more often than I'd care to admit). So I've decided to bare many of those ineffable facets of my life in artistic form all at once. I'm currently working on a piece that I hope will capture my repeated conscious thoughts and inescapable emotions and express them in a way that speaks to others unlike my previous work. In fact, I've decided that in order to articulate these things more powerfully, my final piece will be a two-part piece, with the first half being visual and the second half being "pseudoprose" (to totally coin a term for the hell of it). The pseudoprose will in a sense provide the accompanying story behind the visual part.  Currently it's untitled, but I'm sure something will strike me randomly as it always does.

As 2010 nears its close, I can sense great and meaningful changes on the horizon... well at least I'm hoping for some. Some changes may be unplanned ones, while others may follow directly from the things I am setting into motion as we speak. I have no way of knowing if they will be bad changes or good changes, but I do know that I'll continue pushing forward until death strips the air from my lungs and the spark from my heart. 

Te prometo.

- Fred